2am Thoughts

 I used to wish weird things on myself when I was younger.

I wanted glasses (I tried to spoil my eyesight on many occasions), I wanted to be asthmatic 🤦🏾‍♀️

But it was because I felt people that had all these things were special, I wanted to be special too.

I figured since others were at their beck and call, I felt that maybe if I was sick too I'd get the attention they were getting. 

I'd have a lot to friends who will help me when I'm about to faint😅, seniors will not let me do any work and I'd be everyone's favourite.

Now that I think of it, it saddens me. What happened to my self esteem that I wished to be sick just so I could have friends and feel loved.

This blog post isn't taking the direction I wanted it to go. It was supposed to be a funny story but there's nothing funny about a 10 year old wishing to be sick. 

Maybe I'm thinking too deeply about this. Let me know in the comment section if you ever had weird thoughts like this as a child, I'd love to hear your story.